3 Ways to Find Yourself When You Lose Your Job

Sheena Stemler All, Career Tips, Job Search Tips Leave a Comment


Have you recently lost a job you really loved? Or a job you disliked but relied on for your income? If so, you probably feel as though someone just kicked you in the gut. More than likely, thoughts like the following are running through your head 24/7:

“How will I pay my bills?”

“What’s so wrong with me that my employer had to fire me?”

“This is so embarrassing.”

“I feel like such a failure.”

“I am furious. This is so unfair!”

If you find yourself in the unfortunate situation of having been recently fired, take a deep breath. Everything is going to be OK. Really.

Hearing that you’ve lost your job is some of the most devastating news you can receive. However painful this experience has been for you, take heart: When you lose your job, this is when you can find yourself.

How to Find Yourself When You Lose Your Job

Many times, a person will feel like they “lose his/herself” when they lose a job. This is destructive and entirely avoidable. It’s totally normal to feel grieved at your loss, but you don’t have to let your circumstances threaten your identity.

Here are a few ways that you can grow through the experience of losing a job:

1. Reevaluate Your Core Desires – What is it you want out of life? You’d be surprised how many people don’t have an answer to this question. Trying to keep up with the pace of a full-time job sometimes causes you to push your true desires to a place where you can no longer access them. Now that you have more time on your hands, can you recall what it is you really want in life? Recovering your core desires will be key to choosing your next path.


2. Reestablish Your Identity – It is more common than not for people to enmesh their identity with their career. Many individuals almost totally identify with their profession. “I am a teacher,” “I am an accountant,” “I am a librarian.” I AM what I do. These mindsets blind us to the fact that we are not what we do. We are who we are apart from our professions. Take this time to remember who you were before you began the job you just lost, and who you want to be.


3. Release Yourself from Regret – Regret is one of the most unpleasant emotions one can experience. Unavoidably, this feeling is triggered when a job is lost. Although you cannot control what emotions you feel, you absolutely can control what emotions you keep. Holding onto regret will do nothing good for you. Give yourself some time to feel your regret and internally work through what went wrong. Then, make a conscious decision to let go of regret so you can fully receive the good things that are bound to come to you.


There is nothing fun about losing a job. In fact, there are few things more upsetting. The good news is, you can use this opportunity to truly find and reinvent yourself. In doing so, you will attract another job, one that is better suited to you than the one you lost.

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